To the man i patiently wait for :)

Dear THE ONE,

Lately, I have been wondering all about you – your doings, how you are, where you are, who you are with, how you make up your day. Just everything, I think of them all. I ain’t really that eager to meet and get acquainted with you. It’s just that I can’t help but think of the future and you’re in it—in my future views and plans.

You certainly are the invader of my thought process. For all you know, I’m supposed to be sleeping right now, but I just can’t. I wonder why this not-so-romantic side of me comes out at this very rare while.

Do you have any idea of when we’re gonna meet? When will our paths cross? Where? How? Or have we met already? Have I called your name once, twice, thrice or so? Most likely you are a stranger I will, one day, come in contact with, aren’t you?

Foolish me! Why would I be asking you these? You must have no clue, not even a spot of inkling.

At the moment, you must probably be thinking of your future too. I don’t expect that you contain me in your prospect. I just wanna know what you’re upcoming goings-on are. Will you be an engineer two to three years from now? Or you might become a doctor? A lawyer? A pilot? An architect? Maybe an artist? Oh no, not a celebrity please. I vigorously have no idea on how to face the spotlight, appear on-screen, handle successive tell-all interviews and narrate to the whole Philippines how you proposed on me. (HahahaJ) That crazy thought deserves a good laugh. Well, you don’t need to be that pretty-faced, although I’m yearning that you’ll never ever look as if you are Quasimodo’s evil nasty twin. (Laughs)

You know what? When I was younger, I’ve always thought that love and life were like fairytales. I even had this crazy notion that a prince would come along my way, ride me to his white horse, take me to his castle and crown me his princess. But earlier then, I’ve realized that I have a nice home so I don’t need a castle; that I’m not a princess and therefore I don’t need a prince at all. So I spent my younger years playing with peers, learning at school, doing fun at all times and not even thinking of YOU coming to my life. My life then was too preoccupied with the love of my family and friends which I believed was enough to make me whole.

Years passed and here I am, developed and grown up. For some bizarre reasons, I’ve learned to know a bit about love – a bunch of smiles plus a couple of heartaches plus a cluster of tears. You see? I know how bittersweet it could actually taste. Truth be told, I am still not that good in handling relationships. So bear with me, please.

The one who patiently waits for you, ♥MICHELLE♥

Think again

heartfelt

No Christmas for thousands in Mindanao shelters

Agence France-Presse

CAGAYAN DE ORO CITY, Philippines–Thousands of people in Mindanao are facing Christmas in emergency shelters after floods that left more than 1,000 people dead and another 1,000 unaccounted for.

As government workers recovered more bodies of those killed when tropical storm “Sendong” (international codename: Washi) hit last weekend, one local mayor bleakly told those left homeless or bereaved by the floods that there would be no Christmas this year.

Tens of thousands of people are jammed in crowded evacuation centers, short of water and sanitation facilities.

“There is no Christmas,” Vicente Emano, mayor of the hard-hit city of Cagayan de Oro curtly said Saturday when asked if he would be delivering his traditional holiday message.

Sendong spawned heavy rains, overflowing rivers and flash floods that wiped out whole villages, many built on riverbanks and sandbars in the coastal port cities of Cagayan de Oro and Iligan the worst hit last Saturday.

The government civil defence agency put the toll of dead at 1,100 with 1,079 reported missing although it remained unclear if some of the missing were among the hundreds of unidentified corpses already recovered.

The storm and floods have displaced around 330,000 people with more than 69,000 others huddled in emergency shelters.

Just hours after the latest death toll was announced, village chairman Cairunding Embader said his staff had found 16 more dead bodies on the outskirts of Iligan City.

Emano said city employees and search team members would be working through the Christmas holidays, recovering bodies and caring for those who evacuated their homes.

To deal with the hundreds of dead, with the stench of decomposing bodies in parts of the city being overwhelming, Emano said two large communal graves had been dug and unclaimed bodies would soon be buried in them.

While Christmas is normally one of the most festive times of the year in the Philippines, a largely-Roman Catholic country, few in the affected areas felt like celebrating.

“Because of this flood, I don’t know if our Christmases will ever be merry,” said Junie Legaspi, 32, a vendor who lost his house and livestock animals in the flood.

Huddled in an evacuation center, wearing an ill-fitting woman’s blouse donated to him, Legaspi fought back tears as he said his eight children would forever associate Christmas with the floods.

“This is the worst Christmas gift one can receive.”

source: INQUIRER NEWS

from the heart

Prayer is the best healing method.

Pope prays for victims of ‘Sendong’

Agence France-Presse, Associated Press

VATICAN CITY—Pope Benedict XVI on Christmas Day prayed for the victims of devastating floods in the Philippines and Thailand in his “Urbi et Orbi” (Latin for “To the City and to the World”) speech from the central loggia of St. Peter’s Basilica.

In his traditional Christmas message, the Pope said the two Southeast Asian nations had endured “grave hardships.”

More than a thousand people were killed and countless others are missing from the flooding spawned by Tropical Storm “Sendong” in southern Philippines, while 600 people died in the July-November flooding in Thailand.

“Let us turn our gaze anew to the grotto of Bethlehem. The Child whom we contemplate is our salvation! He has brought to the world a universal message of reconciliation and peace,” he told thousands of jubilant tourists and pilgrims in the sun-drenched piazza below.

“May the Lord come to the aid of our world torn by so many conflicts which even today stain the earth with blood … May he bring an end to the violence in Syria, where so much blood has already been shed,” the Pope said.

“May he grant renewed vigor to all elements of society in the countries of North Africa and the Middle East as they strive to advance the common good,” he added, following the revolts in Egypt, Libya and Tunisia.

Concluding his message, the Pope voiced Christmas greetings in 65 languages including Aramaic, Icelandic and Samoan to cheers from the crowd.

‘Superficial glitter’

In his Christmas Eve Mass, Benedict decried the increasing commercialization of Christmas as he urged the faithful to look beyond the holiday’s “superficial glitter” to discover its true meaning.

He presided over the service in a packed St. Peter’s Basilica, kicking off an intense two weeks of Christmas-related public appearances that will test the 84-year-old Pontiff’s stamina amid signs that fatigue is starting to slow him down.

The Christmas Eve Mass was moved up to 10 p.m. from midnight several years ago to spare the Pope a late night that was to be followed by an important Christmas Day speech.

In a new concession this year, Benedict processed down the basilica’s central aisle on a moving platform to spare him the long walk. He appeared tired by the end of the Mass and a dry cough interrupted his homily.

In his homily, Benedict lamented that Christmas had become an increasingly commercial celebration that obscured the simplicity of the message of Christ’s birth.

“Let us ask the Lord to help us see through the superficial glitter of this season, and to discover behind it the child in the stable in Bethlehem, so as to find true joy and true light,” he said.

It was the second time in as many days that Benedict had pointed to the need to rediscover faith to confront the problems facing the world today.

In his end-of-year meeting with Vatican officials on Thursday, Benedict said Europe’s financial crisis was largely “based on the ethical crisis looming over the Old Continent.”

Benedict officially kicked off Christmas a few hours before the evening Mass, lighting a candle in his studio window overlooking St. Peter’s Square in a sign of peace, as crowds gathered to witness the unveiling of the Vatican’s larger-than-life-sized Nativity scene.

Security tight

Security was tight for the Midnight Mass, as it had been in recent years.

There were no repeats of the 2008 and 2009 Christmas Eve security breaches, in which a woman with a history of psychiatric problems and wearing a telltale red sweat shirt jumped the wooden security barrier along the basilica’s central aisle and lunged for the Pope.

Next weekend, the Pope will preside over a New Year’s Eve vespers service, followed by a New Year’s Day Mass.

A few days later he will celebrate Epiphany Mass followed by his traditional baptizing of babies in the Vatican’s frescoed Sistine Chapel. With a report from the New York Times News Service

SOURCE: INQURER NEWS

merry christmas

Love for mother

2 sisters die in saving ma

By Cai Panlilio

CAGAYAN DE ORO CITY—A mother dying for her children is not all that rare an occurrence, but in Herminia Felicilda’s case, it was her two daughters who died for her.

On the night of Dec. 16 when the great flood came, Naomi Felicilda, 46, and Sarah Benegildo, 50, were busy preparing for the next day’s family reunion to celebrate their mother’s 88th birthday.

The two women and another sister, Letty, were living with their mother in a rented two-bedroom house in Barangay Balulang. Their other siblings, except for sister Fe Chisley who is based in Maryland in the United States, live in nearby Opol town in Misamis Oriental and in Ozamiz City and were to travel to Cagayan de Oro to mark the happy occasion with them.

Little did the family know that the planned gathering would turn into a wake for Naomi and Sarah.

Herminia, the mother of 12 children and widowed for many years now, recalled that the electricity went off in their community at about 11 p.m. on Dec. 16.

“I heard a loud explosion outside and I asked my daughters what it was,” she said.

But before any of them could check, muddy floodwaters started pouring into the house.

The mother and her daughters made their way to a bedroom in total darkness. With the water rising very fast inside the house, they looked around for furniture to climb on to.

‘Don’t be afraid’

Naomi and Sarah turned up a wooden bed, hoisted their mother on it, and propped it up at both ends.

Herminia said she thought the ceiling had collapsed because she could feel it on her head. “They were holding the bed for me. They tried to hold on to the railings of the window so they would not drown, but the water was already too deep,” she said.

In less than an hour, the floodwaters had almost reached the ceiling of the house. But Herminia said she was calm because she knew her daughters would take care of her.

Naomi may have been the first to drown, she said, her eyes brimming with tears. She said the last words she heard from Naomi were: “Sar, I can’t breathe anymore.”

A few minutes later, she heard Sarah say: “Ma, don’t be afraid … I’m here.”

Then everything went silent, the mother said. She called out her daughters’ names, but all she could hear was the sound of the floodwaters splashing against the wall.

Herminia said that at around 5 a.m., or six hours later, neighbors passing in front of the house rescued her. Wading through the muddy water after coming down from the upended bed, she felt the thigh of one of her daughters brush against her.

She saw her children’s bodies when neighbors brought them out of the house. They were among the first taken to Bollozos Memorial Homes.

Close relationship

Letty Felicilda survived the flood only because she was unable to come home that night because of the downpour.

But Letty does not feel lucky to be alive. “How can I feel lucky when two of my sisters are dead?” she said.

It has been a week since Naomi and Sarah lost their lives, but the Felicildas have yet to schedule the interment because they are still awaiting the arrival of  Fe Chisley, who is stranded in New York.

Chisley has been living in Maryland for the past 12 years and is waiting for a flight to the Philippines as a chance passenger. It is she who financially supports her mother and sisters, according to Letty.

All the siblings enjoy a warm relationship but it was Fe, Naomi and Sarah who were particularly close, Letty said. She said the three women regularly spoke on the phone to catch up on one another’s lives.

Joe Felicilda, an elder brother, recalled that Naomi and Sarah were always welcoming when he dropped in for a visit. “Though we live far from each other, we were very close,” he said.

Viewing his sisters in their coffins, he said: “They were very loving aunts to my children.”

Naomi was unmarried, like Letty. Sarah was widowed two years ago and regularly traveled from Cagayan de Oro to Santiago, Agusan del Norte, to visit her husband’s grave.

The Felicildas are once more reunited, not to celebrate Herminia’s birthday, but to bury Naomi and Sarah, who so loved their mother that they gave up their lives for her.

SOURCE: INQUIRER NEWS

Write Your Own Life

Suppose someone gave you a pen - a sealed, solid-colored pen.

 

You couldn't see how much ink it had. It might run dry after the first few tentative words or last just long enough to create a masterpiece (or several) that would last forever and make a difference in the scheme of things. You don't know before you begin.

Under the rules of the game, you really never know. You have to take a chance!

Actually, no rule of the game states you must do anything. Instead of picking up and using the pen, you could leave it on a shelf or in a drawer where it will dry up, unused.

But if you do decide to use it, what would you do with it? How would you play the game?

Would you plan and plan before you ever wrote a word? Would your plans be so extensive that you never even got to the writing?

Or would you take the pen in hand, plunge right in and just do it, struggling to keep up with the twists and turns of the torrents of words that take you where they take you?

Would you write cautiously and carefully, as if the pen might run dry the next moment, or would you pretend or believe (or pretend to believe) that the pen will write forever and proceed accordingly?

And of what would you write: Of love? Hate? Fun? Misery? Life? Death? Nothing? Everything?

Would you write to please just yourself? Or others? Or yourself by writing for others?

Would your strokes be tremblingly timid or brilliantly bold? Fancy with a flourish or plain?

Would you even write? Once you have the pen, no rule says you have to write. Would you sketch? Scribble? Doodle or draw?

Would you stay in or on the lines, or see no lines at all, even if they were there? Or are they?

There's a lot to think about here, isn't there? 

Now, suppose someone gave you a life...

(This wonderful article is written by David A. Berman)

impromptu.

One could fall in love many times during the course of a lifetime, but the first rush of love always holds a special place in our hearts. The novelty, like the first drops of dew on an untouched leaf, of the feeling makes it special and unforgettable.

There had really been nothing so special about this day...

except that, YOU WERE BACK. 

I don't know. I ain't even sure if it must really be a reason to consider this day a SPECIAL one.

While reading all the messages you sent me days ago (which I WONDER WHY I'VE JUST NOTICED TODAY),my heart was really beating so fast that I almost faint...my eyes got misty out of the blue..

til

i rapidly burst into tears when i've read the last words,

"i'm sorry in a million ways, i hope we could still be friends."

Believe me, I hope so too, but you think it'll be that easy? DON’T YOU THINK IT MUST’VE TOO LATE NOW?

God knows how much I prayed that everything between us wasn't over yet... that there’s still a way to bring you back to me...that there’s still a chance for you and me to become US...

God also knows how hard I tried to delete you from my system, how I wished I could forget how much you mean to me, how much I resisted to love you more every waking day. But God didn’t grant me these.

Just this morning, my friend asked me this question.

"What if CHAMCHIM comes back?"

You know what I said?

“I’d act as if HE WERE NEVER GONE.”

But now, I don’t even know if I could still pretend as if you were never gone, as if everything was so okay that we can easily patch things up.

I swear, it ain’t that easy to do.

At this very moment, THERE’S JUST ONE THING I WISH:

TO LEARN THE TRUTH.

So bear with me please.

This is only one thing I ask of you. Tell me everything I have to know.

So I can now completely go on with the life I should long have.

I hope someday everything will all make perfect sense.


 P.S.

 I don't exactly dedicate this to you. Let's perhaps say, this is for that someone I thought you were. :-(

Chamchim still matters to me. But you dont have to worry much. Im getting better now.

---Wednesday, August 3, 2011 at 1:40am

I wanted you for Christmas

Don’t be alarmed if a fat man grabs you and sticks you in his bag, because I told Santa that I wanted you for Christmas.

christmas

 a season to celebrate

LOVE and LIFE

whimsical.

Dear intruder of my inner thoughts,

After a year of self-pampering this broken hearted me, I confess, nothing really has changed. You still inhabit both my dreams and my nightmares. Thoughts of you remain unaltered deep within my core. Memories of you cross my mind most seconds of most hours of most days. You still matter, not only to me, but to this hurting heart of mine.

Everytime I return to the past, my psyche devastatingly retracts how every single secret was entangled, how hard I fought off all those melancholic moments, how my time was splurged paying attention to my heart shattering to pieces, how I naively drenched myself into self pity.

I patiently convince myself that I can get numb with the pain by indulging myself to drudgery. But it doesn’t work. Every tiny fragment of what used to be bears so much to be forgotten. Worse, I even tend to keep the delusion that you are never gone, that you will find your way back home, that I, somehow, still matter to you.

I want to hate you to cover up all the pain you’ve inflicted in me. I mangle my mind to remember all your flaws but I end up loathing myself even more for I still manage to love you, for at the end of every day I nonetheless find myself so passionately, foolishly in love with you.

I turn out to be a hostage of my own horrible emotions, a victim of inscrutable misery. Yet consider me a criminal... because loving you is a crime I am guilty of.

Believe me, I do not anymore wish to meet you on crossroads in the future, to have you in my life once again or to even hear a thing from you – not anymore. I cannot withstand a man like you any longer. I cannot bear another amalgamation of heartbreak, regret, sorrow and pain into my system. I no longer have enough vigour to shed a river of tears for you, to turn another bunch of nights to a sleepless one, to drift myself into nothingness. I surrender...right this exact moment. (July 31, 2011)

The idea that you’re having a happier life ahead of you without me is murdering my soul. Time will come, you’ll get acquainted with people far, far better than me and eventually, you’ll realize that I am not worthy of your time anymore. Don’t worry. I’m working out to finally, completely accept that you are long gone now and that you’re gonna come back for me no more.

On the road to recovery,

Michelle 

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Guys join #phchurpchurp now! Get rewarded for your social networks! It's really cool!

IN ANOTHER LIFE (by The Veronicas)

I have known you my whole life
When you were ten, you said you'd make me your wife
Eight years later you won me over
Just as I took the world on my shoulders

I got used to living without you
Endless phone calls and dreaming about you
Always said that you were my man to be 
But I guess I was in love with your memory


You know I love you, I really do
But I can't fight anymore for you
And I don't know, maybe we'll be together again
Sometime, in another life
In another life

I know I said that I would keep my word
I wished that I could save you from the hurt
But things will never go back to how we were
I'm sorry I can't be your world

You know I love you, I really do
But I can't fight anymore for you
And I don't know, maybe we'll be together again
Sometime, in another life
In another life (another life)

The way you're holding on to me
Makes me feel like I can't breathe
Just let me go, just let me go
It just won't feel right inside
God knows I've tried

You know I love you, you know I do
But I can't fight anymore for you
And I don't know, maybe we'll be together again
Sometime, in another life

In another life, in another life

In another life.

-this really is a beautiful sad song.. makes one cry really hard. :(

a blue rose

The blue rose being in itself something very extraordinary expresses that very same feeling. "You are extraordinarily wonderful", the blue rose exclaims. A truly wonderful personality, almost chimera-like is what the blue rose says about the receiver. A flight of fancy, an irrepressible imagination is what the blue rose is all about.

Blue and its deeper shade purple have for long symbolized mystery and ambiguity. Again, the fact that the blue rose is a flower that has been fabricated increases this sense of surrealism. The meaning of the blue rose in this sense is an appreciation for something that cannot be grasped in full measure.


The lighter shade of the blue rose, which is almost akin to lilac, expresses the first flush of love. Enchantment, a feeling of being completely bowled over in the very first instance is another delightful meaning of the blue rose. Lavender and lilac have both been associated with romance since time immemorial.

The blue rose is also used as a symbol of caution. It expresses a need to be discrete. Again, there is a whiff of secrecy and mystery as expressed by the blue color.

Life is a gift

This is gonna be the start of my new adventure. :)
it's actually my first time to do such blog. HAHAHA
still clueless though.. i hope everything's gonna work well after all. :)

With God, everything is possible.

-this is just a trial.